This is for all the friends that love me.
Backstory: I have
agonized for 20 years about what type of diabetes I have, and whether
I'm faking it, and had bouts of denial, and binged myself into a coma
last year which almost killed me. I know it's emotionally crazy, but
I'm being honest about all my horrible feelings.
I will be
eligible for Medicare in less than a year and a half, and I've been in
excruciating emotional pain thinking that my C-peptide would be too
high for them to cover my pump. So when a friend on TuDiabetes got hers
done, and JUST squeaked in under the line (110% of the low end of
normal), I put my heart in my mouth and decided to get mine done too.
She suggested that I do it privately, because I have been just too
scared to ask my doc because once a higher than cutoff C-peptide has
been recorded, the shit has hit the fan.
So I went and got a
blood draw yesterday, and wasn't expecting results so soon, but there
they were in my email box this morning. And:
0.9 (normal range 1.1-4.4) !!!!!
This is EXCEEDINGLY good news, for 2 reasons. First, I'm solidly below
the cutoff, AND I do have residual insulin production, which clearly
contributes to better control. How lucky can I get?
shaking with relief, and now I have to ask my endo's office to request
the results, because I CAN share them. And hopefully never have to have
Still reluctant to actually call myself Type 1,
(still prefer Type Weird), but at least I know I'm not a
hyperinsulinemic, insulin-resistant Type 2. No insult to Type 2's --
you know that I have utmost empathy for them, but I really needed help
with dealing with all the shame and blame issues that are imposed on
Type 2's when I believed in my heart of hearts that that's what I
Maybe this is a ramble, but I needed to do it. And if you respond to me, I'll feel even better!